You have to......

These days I don't feel like blogging much. Been very lazy and thoughts seem to be evading me. 

But I felt a strong urge to scribble something today and rather than writing it down I am filling it here.

What will I talk about other than what happens in my little world. To be writing about the outside world and worldly things, I don't think I have the mettle to do that. Besides, I have decided to keep my life simple, devoid of thoughts that are profound and of otherworldly. For the time being, let my thoughts revolve around me and my little world that comprises those few people who matters most to me. 

Life has taken me through its myriad courses. When I look back I realize after all it wasn't that bad and there were many things I learned in this course of my life.

People come in and go out of our life. Some remain as buddies forever...  Some are easily forgotten.  Some teach us a lot about life.  Some give us a purpose for our life.  Some motivate us.  Some cheer us.  Some pull us down.  Some stay with us forever. Yes, this 'some' includes my family, friends, relatives, and almost everyone who has come into contact with me in this short life of mine. People who stay in our minds for a long time are the ones who have influenced us the most. They are the ones who must have been the very reason for our existence. I'm really lucky to have met some really good people like that. But such people are very less and very rare to find.

I often wonder how human beings influence each other so much so that their lives becomes so intertwined and can never be separated. When we look at the lives of animals, the influence they have on the other members of their own species are not so complex and bounding like what we find in human lives. It's very minimal. God is really strange to have created this human species without which the world would have been very very different place.

I wonder why is it that Yours Truly has become so thoughtful and philosophical today. But she is sometimes. Can't help it.

The 'Low' Episode

Well, back again with a bang!!!

:D ..My own attempts at making my blog entry a little dramatic... A blog with practically no readers but myself needs some self-boosting. But I love this, my blog and its uniqueness- In the sense that I am recording my thoughts in this blog of mine which could be read by some dear and close friends to whom I have shared the link. Though I don't have any regular readers to my blog, it is good. I am in love with my own blog :-) :-o I guess that's called 'pygmalionism.'

Now, coming to my title The 'Low' Episode. Yes, let me explain a little here. It refers to my bouts of low BP tendencies in the past two or three weeks. This low BP episode has become the talk of my colleagues the moment they see me around. The various and numerous advices and suggestions I have been receiving for the past few weeks to increase my BP to its normal -stable level has been tremendous and humongous!!! I mean whenever I meet a colleague or friend of mine who knows about this low BP episode of mine would start giving me suggestions on improving my diet. So much so that now I can advise anyone on the diet for a person with low BP.

To make it clear, it all started with a fainting episode one early morning (few weeks back) followed  by a BP check-up which showed it to be very low. After that incident, whenever I feel dizzy and tired in the middle of the day or in the evening or at times, in the morning itself, I just walk into the clinic in our campus and just get my BP checked by the nurses there. Every time, I get to see a wrinkled brow, a frown, or some strange not-so-fine expression on their faces. They would ask me, "Hey, you don't eat or what? Have lime juice with salt in it!!! Eat loads ma..Have fruits...take care..Have food from canteen".. so on and so forth. After checking a few times, I just stopped going there. Even when I feel dizzy or tired. I would just try my own methods to increase my BP and guess at times I succeed too.

After a few bouts of self-treatment I fell sick again. I mean veryyy low BP this time and finally decided to get home and be done with a thorough medical examination. Well, Dad was summoned as I wasn't allowed to travel alone. Poor Dad, with two daughters, always on wheels to fetch us, drop us, accompany us wherever, whatever and whenever. It feels good to be in the warm security of our dear and near ones. But quite often I do feel guilty for troubling them. Can't help it. I mean in our place a woman can't travel alone after 6pm. We can't take chances by traveling alone early in the morning before sunrise. If we do, then we would be nothing more than the hot topic of discussion in the next day's newspapers and TV channels. People from Kerala will understand why???

Well, coming back to the "Low Episode". I got a thorough medical check up -- blood tests, X-Ray, ECG, Scanning and what not. Spent four thousand bucks. And the results: I'm perfectly ok. No solid reason could be found out for the bouts of Low BP except that my pleasure of skipping my meals and breakfasts of and on was the villain. And Yes, I don't have enough Calcium in my body. I was prescribed to take Ca tablets for a month!

So here goes my anecdote, the low episode of my life! Hopefully bored my readers to death!

Stars Again!!!

It  feels really good to come back. It becomes necessary at times.

My mind is in a tumultuous state and it needs some relaxation and digression. My blog is always the best place for me to return to. I know I won't be judged here. I know I won't be questioned here. I know I won't have to fear anything here. This is my place, solely mine and I can divulge and indulge the way I want. No, I don't mean to say, I am thwarted in any way in my life otherwise. But there are certain things in our life which are beyond us and beyond our capabilities to change or sway according to our wishes. The stars and planets which rule the hearts of many a million, and which people think are the sole reason for the why and when of certain things in our life. I don't know whether I should be cribbing about any of these or just sit back and watch the stage enactments of all these follies and frolics.

Things happen so soon and so slow at times. Seems to me like I am reading a work of fiction. Life has baffled me many a times and it continues still. I really wish I do get a picture of things to be.

I'm getting so philosophical and I guess I must stop now.

To be or not to be.........

I have been away for quite some time. I mean from my blog. I strongly feel that I must write as often as I can. There are so many reasons why I have been away. But I don't want to share it now :)
Life's uncertainties have always baffled me. This time to such an extent that I really can't explain it. But the best thing this time around is that I'm loving it. Yes, it has been a week of surprises. A week, that has gone too fast and too confusing.
Happy weekend to myself !!!

Homewards :)

Missing my dear and near ones...

Guess I would get over the feeling today as I am going home after a couple of weeks...

I don't understand why at times, some sort of strange and peculiar feelings pop up in me when I don't visit home for a long time. I don't really think it could be termed as "Homesickness" as I am used to staying away from home for many years. But the feeling never goes off. I feel like drinking the water at home, breathe the fresh air, laze around in my home and garden, watch the birds cackling and cooing on a sunny afternoon, the mango trees bearing the first blossoms, the jack fruits ripe and big and many more sights just awaiting my arrival. I feel like watching all this and be a part of all that is happening around that little world of mine where I can be my true self, devoid of chains and worries and rules. It is so nice to be at one's own home and do specifically nothing but just be yourself and relax. That is a feeling inexplicable as far as I am concerned.

So off to home, though I could have started early in the afternoon but was impeded by some unnecessary formalities and stuff.

I am gonna embark on my journey homewards :) Though it is only a matter of five or six hours, it means quite a lot to me.

Friends are born not made!!!

I am dedicating this post to some very special people in my life.. Let me take this narrative through those few folks in my life who mean a lot to me.. who have been my pillars of support at the most needed occasions... They have influenced me in different ways in different phases of my life.. Yes, I am talking about the best of my buddies! My friends who have stayed by me through thick and thin. Those friends who touched my heart in a way that their friendship would be fondly remembered even if they cease being my friend. I have cent percent faith in most of them. I never doubted their intentions. So here goes the list:

1. Sweety - I must say a really cute and lovable person. We seldom meet each other. Sweety was one of the first best friends I made in school. Yes, our friendship since then had remained intact. It just grows as years pass by. More of a soul mate, even if we don't talk often, we could just continue from where we left. She is blessed with a baby boy and am really really happy for her. Our friendship has successfully celebrated 14 years and am damn sure it will continue to flourish no matter what or where our geographical locations are.

2.M - I can't tell you how grateful I am to you. You had taught me a lot. I admire you a lot. The kind of determination and strength that you displayed in spite of the setbacks and hardships you faced is amazing. It is rare to find people like you. You are very independent, devout and a little sensitive. (Your sensitive side is less known to the world). You pass off for an 'Iron Lady'. I can't thank you enough for being there as a pillar of support at a time when I needed you the most. You are the classic example for "a friend in need is a friend indeed". This was one of the earliest proverbs I learned in my great school.

3. M2 - Amazing that I have some very good friends who've names starting with M. M2 is very humble. M2 is very sensible, mature and intelligent. But M2 can be a little childish very rarely.Words are not often required when we have to convey something to her. She senses the situations, learns quickly from the surroundings. It is the kind of same wavelength which makes me comfortable to be friends with you. And yes, you are very generous in your love towards friends.

4. K - Chirpy, bubbly, lively - these are the adjectives with which I would like to describe you. Again it is a kind of wavelength and warmth that helps the two of us in confiding with each other. It is really good to have friends like you. I had criticized you at times, but my dear I just intended your well being. You are child like and childish alternatively!! I like you the way you are..

5.G- OMG! You are just adorable. Whenever we were together you had been just like a sibling. I must say an elder sis! I really loved being scolded by you. You were one unique character that I have ever met. So short-tempered, yet very idealistic, determined and self-willed. You were amazing. I have learned a lot from you as well. I felt so secure when you were around. You took care of me, motivated me and what not. I wish we could spent some time together.

That's all for today and thank you dear friends for being in my life in different stages of my life.

In blues for you sis...

Depressed!!!
This is the catchword today. Students are depressed. Professionals are depressed. Housewives are depressed. Who isn't depressed? Various shades and degrees of depression.
I'm also slightly depressed owing to various reasons. I have read somewhere that realizing the reasons and the causes for your grief or depression and comprehending that they would not stay on helps you in getting out of it gradually. Can I then not list out a few of them here. That would be better.
1. A student's arrogance dogged me in the morning, first session after a break.

2. An update in fb spoiled the rest of my day.

3. And this is the worst of all. And here I need to explain a little in detail. A news in the newspaper which I didn't read on purpose for fear of this depression sinking in more. But my poor mom had to share it with me when I called her at night. A girl (Soumya) in her early twenties was brutally molested during her train journey. She was going from her workplace to home. The attack and further atrocities meted out on her led to her death.

As usual, after the incident - the media, public, government, NGOs, Women's associations all came to the forefront claiming and disclaiming, portraying and narrating the various aspects of the gruesome murder. I don't want to go through the details of the morbid crime. But it was the most heinous one I have heard in recent times.

Why is it that women in our country are being ill-treated like this? Do we have to question the very foundation of our society and culture? Indian culture is upheld and praised like anything by West and East alike. I can't understand the barbaric tendencies displayed by men. Why are they succumbing to the animal instincts in them? Are these brutes still an animal and less human? Can't they discern what is right and what is wrong? Whatever it is, the part which hurt me most was the plight of the girl's mother who had insisted her daughter to travel on the same night to her native as one guy was coming to see her the next day. This is yet another custom here when marriages are 'arranged' by the girl and the boy's family.

A mother can identify well with her daughter. The mother-daughter relationship, I would say is the most beautiful of all the relations created by God. The perfect calm, sense of security, love and warmth that we get from our mother is incomparable. I am very close to my mother and she is perhaps one of the first "Best Friends" that I have made.

Poor mom, she was so upset after reading the news and watching the girl's burial in TV channels (Yeah.. As I said the media was dying to celebrate cover the story live). Both of my mom's daughters are put up in two different places far away from her. One is working and another is studying. After the first few journeys accompanied by dad or friends, now mostly we travel by ourselves. How can she feel at ease when she reads and hears such gruesome episodes? I don't mean to say this is quite recurrent in our society. But it could happen to ANYONE. Our own land and country being unsafe for us. Where else can we feel safer??

I can't express what I feel towards you, Soumya. Your life was snatched away from you and the society has responded immensely. But all this hue and cry would stop soon and there would be hardly any measures taken to safeguard women when they are out in the world. May your soul rest in peace and let your mother get the strength to bear your loss.